User blog comment:TCTStudios/"Light in the Darkness"- Chapter One Up!/@comment-5470513-20160226003612

After making a couple of pages and leaving, I didn't expect you to come back. Most users here do that, that's why.

I just finished reading your chapter. It's quite good.

Many explanations about the game and background, but that's fine considering it's the first chapter. You should now start with characterization while you develop the story.

On the other hand, the "fight for a girl" thing seemed a little cliche. I'm not saying that's bad, I'm saying it has been overused. As a general rule, try to avoid this while writing.

But, in general, it's quite good.

This is your first fanfiction? Just curious.

http://saofanon.wikia.com/wiki/User_blog:FedeTkd/Writing_Guidelines_for_New_Users